Samhain Project 3: Jigsaw

The apple of my eye, my kiddo Aidan, (who's been an occasional contributor on here) decided to re-venture down the horror/soap opera path that is the Saw franchise in preparation for the upcoming Saw X.  They started from the beginning.  I didn't want to head all the way back through that path, so last night, Frani and I jumped in where we left off and watched Jigsaw.  

A little history here:  Australia's Spierig Brothers jumped into the cinema scene at the leading edge of the zombie film craze about 18 years ago.  They have a tendency to make films that most folks in the pundit industry criticize, but fans dig.

Undead was their first film and there’s no exception to the rules described above. Shot in their native Down Under with snappy VFX conjured up using the youngsters' home PC.  Talent was on display. They did the excellent but unheralded vampire twist Daybreakers which I love to death and you can smooch my Hokas if you don't like it. 

So the brothers lend their skill to the 8th in the Saw franchise with Jigsaw.  Yes, it may follow the Saw Soap formula in a large way, but there's enough twists and turns here to cut a little bit of a different slice off the Saw cheese block.

I was pleasantly surprised and highly recommend this.  Also, it's perfect for Halloween as the bulk of the entries in the franchise were released for Halloween connectivity.  So why not this one?

The Spierigs lend their talents to some lingering members of the Saw filmmaking family to make a movie that seems to sit on its own in a way while definitely being a quality piece of the Jigsaw puzzle. 

HA!!!!!

Obviously, pun fucking intended.

There's no Shawnee Smith, Detective Hoffman (and his pursed lips) Agent Strahm, or Marky Mark's long suffering brother in this one.  We are blessed with the wonderful Tobin Bell of course.  He's terrific as always.

This one sits somewhere in between all that, and it deserves a round of applause.
 

Samhain Project 3: (With a touch of Spectrum) Wolfen

 

 Wolfen is an interesting piece of The Spectrum era.  I think I was the only member of my household who finished the movie back then.  Everyone else was bored, if I remember properly.  It's an odd exercise.

Wolfen is a pretty good illustration of late 70's/early 80's New York as much of the city's best and worst is shown with terrific cinematography throughout the film by DP Gerry Fisher (Exorcist III, Highlander, Ninth Configuration) the dude’s a legend.   This is a horror film which was conceived by author Whitley Streiber (of Communion and The Oncoming Superstorm fame) and fleshed out into a screenplay by a couple other scribes.   It seems a high society land developer is murdered along with his wife and body man in the wee hours of a celebratory morning.  There must have been a new project approval to pad the billions.

For some reason, a law enforcement group is brought in that specializes in indigenous terrorism (led by Diane Venora) and partnered up with the NYPD.   More of the same murders, gruesome for sure, with great practical effects occur,  but this time it's among the city's derelict. Of course, no one seems concerned except our Hercule Poirot, legendary Albert Finney, and the coroner, a fantastic Gregory Hines, who is responsible for more than a couple laugh-out-loud moments. 

Due to odd forensics, a local wildlife professor is brought in, wonderfully cast with a young Tom Noonan.  For those that don't know, Noonan's career is unheralded, but contains such diverse and wonderful roles as Frances Dollarhyde in Manhunter, (far superior to Red Dragon, the quasi-remake) a soulful Frankenstein's monster in Fred Dekker's The Monster Squad, and lastly the eerie Mr. Ulman in Ti West's cracking House of the Devil. 

The chase is now on for answers and stopping the murders.  Local native Americans are among the suspects, including a young Edward James Olmos.  But not everything is as it seems. 

The script can be a bit of a slog, (that may be because this is the only narrative film directed by a chap generally used for documentaries, Michael Wadleigh, he of Woodstock fame) but Noonan and particularly Hines help that move along.  A great score with early work by James Horner, who had 12 days to complete the pieces, is a boon to the film as well. 

I am lucky enough to have found a great print in one of those 4 pack DVD bundles sold at a generally low cost from Warner Brothers.  

Is this a Halloween Scary Film?  Probably not, but it's intriguing nonetheless.

 

Why Baseball Works Best

 I always told people that baseball was really the only sport you could legitimately make films or write truly great books about.  The most basic reason is that there are so many lulls in the action, so many hushed points where human interaction could be used to develop relationships, hash out conflict, and build to a climax, all while connected by the sticky glue of America's pastime.  Not to mention that in those lulls lie big gaping openings for humor, either slapstick or thoughtful moments.

Cerebral films such as Field of Dreams, Bull Durham, and the ethereal The Natural are perfect examples.  And if it's straight chuckles you're going for, there's always Major League, Mr. Baseball, or Mr. 3000.   

As I age, I find these things to be true also of biographies, autobiographies, and histories in the realm of sport.  I feel the main ingredient is the eccentricity of baseball players.  These players are much weirder, right out front, than I've seen evidence of in football, basketball, or hockey (though the latter, I've read little about).

Baseball seems to have a sort of intravenous connection to the soul that starts in childhood.  It pumps in history, as you go to the library to read about Aaron and Ruth, and feel the warmth of sunny afternoons listening to games while sorting through baseball cards (There's life in these motions too, just check out Josh Wilker's Cardboard Gods).  The games carried short bursts of excitement that speckle an otherwise slow paced melodrama lacing itself into your evening. 

Plus, children are just plain silly, and baseball is a kids game.

I find as I sneak into my 50's that the humor also applies to to the art of biography from the baseball insider.  It weaves itself into the essays of fans whose love of the sport may take pauses as the elements of puberty, romance, and life itself occasionally interrupt, yet never quite recedes into the shadows.  

At least not permanently. 

 What causes the bizarre nature of baseball's players, writers, and more often than not, fans?  I've pondered that long and hard and haven't been able to field an answer.  But I promise I will keep working on it.  The first place I'll look will be the mirror.

As far as biographies go, not everything is a pile of yuks like Jay Johnstone's books, but generally there's a generous dollop of comedy in most cases.  Some examples of course, notwithstanding.  The two I'm reading right now, Ron Anderson's Long Taters and Larry Dierker's It's Not Brain Surgery are not exactly barrels of laughs, but are full of history and baseball lessons.  

More often than not, it is the case that humor is heavily involved in the laying out of baseball players' remembrances and the fans connections to it.   Try to watch a baseball documentary and not find humor, or maybe just some flaming outrageousness, that one can't help but laugh at.  I watched ESPN's four-part series on the 1986 Mets and their World Series run, and despite all the sadness that may have been soaked in those still somehow victorious days, or current life statuses, there was so much incredible ridiculousness, so many quotes, off the field hi-jinks, and knee-jerk acts.  These are often so unreal, you just couldn't help but laugh at them.  (Bill Buckner's saga of unnecessary scapegoating notwithstanding.)

But it's there. The odd-ball natures of personality and crooked intensity of a baseball man.  In full color. Read Jim Bouton's controversial  Ball Four, Sparky Lyle's uproarious The Bronx Zoo, Kevin Cooks non-stop Ten Innings at Wrigley, or Jason Turbow's wonderful Dynastic, Bombastic Fantastic and tell me this game isn't a freakin' hoot. Even the moments where some of these guys want to practically assassinate each other in the locker room bring so much of humanity's stupidity into the glow of daylight, that you can't help but roll your eyes and chuckle at the least.  

I don't have the inside views of the players or writers, but I doubt any athlete plays more practical jokes than the baseball player. Actually, John Kruk once said, "I'm not an athlete, I'm a baseball player",  so maybe that's wrong terminology.  Just read the affore mentioned Jay Johnsone's Temporary Insanity for probably case-closing evidence of this practical joke statement. Hot foots to Shaving Cream pies to hotel room chicanery, ballplayers love it.  

Malapropisms?  

Baseball players deal them like cards in a black jack game.  From Yogi Berra to Jim Gantner, to Padres announcer Jerry Coleman.  (Baseball announcers often write books as funny as the players. Try Bob Uecker's Catcher in the Wry)  The funny thing is they have no clue they just jacked up the English language ("90 percent of baseball is half mental"). Thanks, Yog.

I could probably go on further, but I think I've dropped enough names here so that you can do the exploring yourself, and not be denied the wonderful first-time feeling of experiencing the hilarity.  It's an old game.  It's attached to America along with hot dogs and apple pie.  Some of my earliest memories have elements of it affixed to them like peripheral images.  To me, the chatter of announcers and repressed lull of crowds bring me back over 35 years, and to a certain degree, relax me.  Yes, baseball is in the blood. 

And in the heart. 

And, deeply and enthusiastically entrenched in the funny bone.

 

Samhain Project 3 : No One Will Save You

This movie is like a combination of Signs and What Dreams May Come. 

With absolutely no dialogue.  None.  

Now, the first 75% of the movie is intense as hell and has you on the edge of your cushion.  Then the final quarter is a complete mystery.  I'm a dude who digs an ambiguous ending as much as anyone.

But a confusing one?

Kind of wipes away what was a great exercise in tension building, performed by an actress using no words whatsoever, maestro direction, and visual effects that have serious pop.

I guess I'll have to leave the decision on this one up to you.

Samhain Project Season 3: HOUSE OF SECRETS

Sometime in the fall of 1981, my Mom dropped me off with a couple of her friends for a while as she had some things to do and would be picking me up later.  It was a couple of dudes I didn't really know, sitting around drinking out of foamy Schlitz cans, cooking up sausages (not of the buttered variety, so Gary Busey can relax) in an avocado green electric fry pan, shooting the shit about politics.  Not my scene.

I decided I wanted to go outside and sit on the front stoop (place had no porch, I was inches from gravel) and enjoy the oncoming dusk.  Just before I headed out, one of them said, "Hey Robby, do you want this?" and tossed me a coverless comic book.  I despised coverless comics of any form or fashion.  It was a horror comic also, which I despised as well, much like Corey Haim's character in The Lost Boys.    

However I was bored shitless and gladly and graciously accepted it. 

I sat reading by the light of the falling sun, this book of stories that were eminently engaging, creepy and artful to a degree.   I remembered the tales for decades.  One of a demon infiltrating a family that was particularly disturbing, another of a vampire who was about to be staked, only to have the bloodsucker wake up in his coffin screaming.  In a trope reversal, it was the vampire's nightmare, not the human. 

Now I remembered the stories but not the book, this aided by its coverless condition.  I would infrequently search for it over the years.  But was never able to track it down.  Until I discovered Back Issue Magazine's Facebook page. 

Observe: 

I have now found the comic, and that wonderful rush of familiarity and nostalgia upon reading it after all those years was very strong.  So, yeah, the internet sucks, but in rare occasions, it serves a positive purpose.

the prementioned vampire story was based on a poem called Nightmare by Miriam B. Campbell with great Michael Golden artwork illustrating the story. 

Samhain Project Season 3: The Ritual

 

Imagine a combination of The Descent, Midsommar, and Dog Soldiers.  If that sounds like the cat's pajamas to you, then you're gonna dig the British flick The Ritual.   Its main drive is the "bros on vacation" trope that has been done before, but a tragedy runs a line through the movie pretty ingeniously that gives this flick its pulse.  

Rafe "You've got red on you" Spall leads the cast, as you have four young Englishman who go on an annual adventure of some sort, doing that in the northern Swedish hills in this particular instance.  Due to a particularly clumsy member of their group's injury, they choose to take a shortcut through the woods to their destination, what appears to be an isolated, but luxury lodge. 

You know this is a bad idea, of course. 

What ensues are mysterious Blair Witchian consequences, both natural and supernatural, and a survival quest that feels like some of Neil Marshall's best work.  The Ritual does a pretty good job of keeping you guessing, with a seasoning of creeping you out, and some solid edge-of-your-seat action.  

Recommended, mate.

Samhain Project Season 3: Cursed Films II : Cannibal Holocaust

 "Awful"

That's the word that ends this documentary from Shudder.  It's what actor Carl Yorke uses to describe how The Italian film Cannibal Holocaust makes him feel when he sees it now.  And his testimony through this short doc is convincing. 

Four primary cast members performed in this thing; a legendarily controversial "found footage" bloodbath from 1980 that purports itself to be the first of that cinema verite style.  As my child, Aidan, points out,  Andrzej Zulawski beat director Rugerro Deodato to that punch (not to mention the impalement image, which is so often associated with Holocaust) with On the Silver Globe.  Kid knows of what they speak.  Words are on this blog to prove that.

Of those four actors I mentioned, one thinks the film is high art, two feel it's a crime on celluloid, and one refuses to appear on film to talk about it.

The late Deodato, in his interview segments, feels everything about this movie is wonderfully powerful and beyond reproach.  Especially in regards to its realism.  He strikes me as a dirty old man when others describe his words and actions, and the footage shown here, (of which the most graphic is left out) is more than enough to prove my point. 

I can't be considered an expert in my opinions however, as I haven't seen the film.  I refuse to.  I am a deep lover of animals, and the aggravated murder of creatures captured on film is something I wish to avoid.  I will take the actors' word for how awful it was, however, as the footage that goes "to the brink" in this documentary is all I need.  In combination with their testimony, the case is closed.

This film has its admirers, many working in cinema today.  But there are those interviewed here and film scholars spoken to, that while they may see something here to be admired, they also seem to be backing away while making the declaration.

That word keeps coming back.  When watching most of the folks involved with Deodato's film, there's a haunted look, something that appears to be a mixture of guilt and fear.  One perfect word describes that expression.

"Awful."  

Samhain Project 3: Terrified

Argentina makes its name known in the horror arena!  This movie starts with a fairly quick pair of freak outs and then settles into a queasy paranormal investigation sequence that dissolves quickly.  What this film has going for it is a constant unsettled feeling. 

Oh, yeah, and set pieces that will leave your eyebrows up and your jaw down. Welcome to a haunted neighborhood.  Yes, this area has some serious otherworldly issues affecting multiple homes.  And the shit it puts right in front of your face is consistently chilling.  What the hell is going on in this Buenos Aires subdivision?

The primary character is a detective with health issues. He’s stuck amongst a trio of spook inspectors, and he quickly becomes aware that he’s incapable of doing anything about what he sees; as these malevolent entities become more than just spooky. 

They’re sinister and Diabolical and they're dangerous. 

The movie is non/stop without extreme gore or overtly disturbing violence.  It just brings you some pretty frightening  images and a story that has you buying what they’re selling;  the creeps.  Demian Rugna is a director to keep an eye on.  He's got skills.

Bad Skills, as Shaq used to say.

Turn off the lights, grab your pet and prepare for the movie to provide what its title declares. 

Samhain Project Season 3 : The Boogens

I remember in 1981, as a kid, seeing a movie trailer where screaming victims of an unseen assailant are pulled under floors, down stairs, into vents, etc.  I hated the concept of being "pulled under".  See my thoughts on Blood Beach.

The trailer terrified my 10 year old ass.  At the end of it, that deep movie trailer voice uttered the title of said film:

The Boogens.

That title kind of took a little off the fastball. 

The Boogens (try not to snicker) was released smack dab in the midst of the slasher phenomenon.  The antagonists are monsters in this one, unleashed from a decades-buried mine.  (But you don't know that until the third act).  The film's tension follows the same formula as a standard slasher film anyway.  Despite all that, Stephen King is a fan. 

The dialogue, especially early on, is particularly shitty, which is a shame as almost all the performers here are more than up to the challenge of better stuff.  You may even recognize some of the faces here.  The Boogens has a solid slasher film string score that works nicely.  Frani pointed out when I was researching for the trailer that the music sounded like an attempt at John Carpenter.  None of this trailer tuneage appears in the film.

It's a pretty good tension burner which it uses to offset really low budget effects.  The Boogens is a movie designed for the Halloween time of year, and if you can find a way to absorb it, go for it. 

This is a film, like many of its ilk, that as the decades have passed, has developed a bit of a cult following; which makes it all the more worth the evaluation. 

Boogens.

 

Samhain Project 3 : The Devil's Road

 We all are well versed in the cinema universe that is based on Ed & Lorraine Warren.  They were known as the "grandparents of paranormal research".  This particular piece of television was based on their careers and aired on the Travel Channel.  The Travel Channel is another of those basic cable networks that no longer serves their original purpose, like MTV, NatGeo, CourtTV, et al.  This saddens me, by the way.  The Travel Channel is now pretty much dedicated to locations around the contiguous 48 with paranormal activity or Bigfoot hunters, and this is coming from a guy who believes in Sasquatch.

  But I digress.

  This program, an episode of Shock Docs, is fairly informative, and its accuracy compared to the bombast of The Conjuring film series that is based on their careers, is actually refreshing. Take away the flashing images, (if my epilepsy were of the photosensitive variety, it may have been a problem) stinger music, and growling sound effects and it may actually work as an actual documentary.  Those things are elements of your typical hour long basic cable docudramas, that insult the subjects in this example.  However, there's some pretty cool original footage, interviews with the Warren's daughter and son-in-law, and other paranormal researchers (including Ghost Hunters' Jason Dawes who I recall rolling his eyes at the Warrens about 15 years ago; I guess he's had a change of heart).

  What's nice here among the headache-inducing effects is an actually well done illustration of a love story that lasted decades between two people that, if this is accurate, were really out there just trying to help people pitted helplessly up against evil spirits and demonic presences.   They had the respect and support of the Catholic church and very often local law enforcement.  It's well known that there may be some reason to feel as if they were bullshit artists, but there's also just as much vindication for their having actually encountered some things that just can't be explained.  There's far too many files and tapes, and people they educated and put to work as associates to just wave it all away.

   If you are able to see this, particularly this time of year, give it a go, but a properly produced and shot documentary without the cable tv accoutrements would have worked far better.

  There's also more than enough evidence that serious negative chicanery took place from the Warrens and that ol' Ed may not have been the angel many profess, despite his life-long connection to Christianity.  The divide between them being legitimate and being folks that just happen to be near the noisiness and horror is only made wider by it becoming more and more evident that the cases that made them famous were quite possibly hoaxes. 

  So, I guess just add this to the "whole damn sad thing" category.

   

Samhain Project: Season 3: 101 Scariest Moments (Shudder)

Welcome to the third season of my Samhain Project; an analysis of film, documentaries, and scary television shows to help you ring in the spookiest time of year.  I'm beginning a couple of weeks early, so welcome aboard, and enjoy!

 Back in 2004, cable's Bravo Channel aired a Halloween special which was a 5 part listing of the scariest 100 movie moments.  It was pretty addictive to watch with pretty legitimately culled sequences, a good variance of talking heads (whether they were interviewed for the special specifically is up for debate), and lots of great moments from the films. 

A couple of years later, the channel followed up with a pair of addendum episodes. 

Last year, the streaming service known as Shudder put together a similar collection of horror review.  We watched episodes 3 and 4 (covering movies 75 to 50) and it's a rather mixed bag.  The range of films is good.  It draws from all eras (Nosferatu, Frankenstein, Last House on the Left, and Night House are all covered in these 2 segments), but there's not quite the broad spectrum of analysts that Bravo's predecessor had. Although the Doublemint Twins thoughts on horror can probably be seen as unnecessary.  

As far as the talking heads go, it lacks the comical angle for one, (No Sklar brothers, no Upright Citizens Brigade, no Rob Riggle), and it leans heavily on film scholars (including Shudder's curator), very few actors, but legitimate directors such as Joe Dante, Mike Flanigan, Greg Nicotero, Edgar Wright and Fede Alvarez toss in some nice insight.

It's definitely enjoyable, especially at this time of year, and recommended, though despite all I've stated above, despite movies I didn't expect to be included; it appears to be missing just a little something.