Friday, June 3, 2011

Astral Projection

Leaning on a weathered railing, staring out into the distance, which was a 3 AM, blackened sky, accented by wind through the trees and fireflies, I had a bit of a revelation.

I looked at my past in my agitated state, a past comprised of various leavings...self-induced, disease created, or flat out betrayals. Or a mixture of both....

I started to raise questions within myself and found it exhausting. The answer wasn't hard to find....I take the bullshit factors of my past, amplify them, and project them on to everybody else.

Sooner or later, everyone, is going to desert me, begin to hate me, blame me, or just plain glare at me and HATE.

This isn't healthy....
This isn't right....I am a good person. I have given, I have bled for others. I have been heroic and I have fought the good fight.

My nose is bleeding, but I still breathe. I stand on a rotting railroad tie at a turn is reality, the other is what I am led to believe by my own self-induced inadequacies and self-esteem issues....

Make a move, Rob.

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